“If my kid couldn’t draw very well, I would make sure none of my magnets worked.” - Mitch Hedberg 

( via curioustiff )

Sometimes in the middle of the night, I think of something that’s funny, then I go get a pen and I write it down.  Or if the pen’s too far away, I have to convince myself that what I thought of ain’t funny. - Mitch Hedberg

( via humblydead )

( via specklespack )

(via deadspeck-deactivated20121113)